T-Rexs, Donuts & Pretzels, OH MY! Float On This Summer



Ladies & gentleman, summer is upon us! It’s almost July if you guys haven’t already noticed. The sun is coming out, and clothes are starting to come off. Just how we like it.

Hopefully you have already started on your summer bod so you can jump in on the fun too. But, if you don’t want to dive in and get wet and would rather lounge out like a kardashian with a drink in hand, I’ve got some fun for you too.

Honestly, I’d say that it’s trendier to be on top of the water rather than in the water this summer.

As a matter of fact, I’d say that Summer 2015 is about being on top of the water, rather than in it. And if you’re having a pool party, an empty pool without floaties is like brunch without alcohol- SAD.

If you don’t believe me, just keep reading for a bit. You may find yourself hoppin’ on the bandwagon, or should I say float.

Let’s just say kids don’t understand the struggle we went through of only foam noodles and rubber tubes. Nowadays, you want it, you name it and there’s probably a floaty of it.

So first we got Funboy floaties. Funboy just launched their line of luxury inflatable pool floats last month. We’re talking black swans, pegasus’, white swans and flamingos. Yes please!

Screen Shot 2015-06-23 at 10.43.05 AM

How about some more creatures from fairytales, or even from the latest blockbuster. Jurassic World or How to train your Dragon 2 anyone?! We’re talking T-Rexs & Dragons people! And they’re favorite snacks- Pigs & Cows.

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Now, since we cant indulge on all our sweets and fatty foods this summer (because we need to maintain our summer physique -DUH), why not lay on them? You’re not cheating, I promise. Go on and indulge my friend, INDULGE. You want pizza? Done. Pretzel? Done. Tootsie Roll? Seriously?! YES. Just DONUT get carried away. 😉

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Or, Slimline has made some for those wanting to stay healthy…

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Wait, there’s more. YES, MORE. If I had my way, I would own them all. Overboard? Nah, I’ll stay a-float and keep DUCKing around.


And for those of you who want to pretend your floating in the ocean with some crazy cool creatures like you’re the little mermaid or something, we got more floats for you too. And you can even find these fab floaties at your local grocery store! I found some of mine at Albertsons! And AMAZON.

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And for all you emoji lovers…


So you know what to do now…



I’m all for this trend because I’m sick and tired of all the thoughts I have while jumping in and out of the water: Do i look like a wet dog? Should I flip my hair to be an instant Victoria’s Secret model? Or will I lose an extension? Did i just get a wedgie? Did I just flash a tit? Do I have cellulite shaking/showing? Am I blinding people with my whiteness? No more. Low and behold, your problem SOLVED. You’re welcome.

Just try and stay on top of it… The water that is.

Float on betches.


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